I'm pissed with it all.
This country, the NHS, my parents and whatever else. I'm just fed up with being the one to suffer. Yeah, blah blah I'm emo - I don't care. What's getting me down? Well, let's start with something that is going to drastically change my life. My parents are both going to lose their jobs - hooray! Both are ward managers and both of their wards are closing down. My dad's put 35 years into the NHS and my mum's put in 32 years. Now you pay them back by letting them go? Are you fucking kidding me?
Next point; God. My spiritual life is fucked. I can't pray. You can tell me to concentrate all you want - it's just not happening. I tried praying for Rach to do well in her sports thing the other day and I found it so hard. I started four prayers "Dear God, please let Rachel do well today..." and then I lost any will to carry on. I need help. I used to pray thanking God at least twice a day. Blah.
My friends. Sure, I think I have good friendships but do I? Look at me and Graham - we're constantly arguing. Me and Rachel; what friendship? Me and Luke is a good example, I threw that "good friendship" away. All Rachel's fault.
My PC; always has problems. Hmm...
And whatever else. So pissed at stuff. Oh, and parents are constantly pissed at me. -_-
Next point; God. My spiritual life is fucked. I can't pray. You can tell me to concentrate all you want - it's just not happening. I tried praying for Rach to do well in her sports thing the other day and I found it so hard. I started four prayers "Dear God, please let Rachel do well today..." and then I lost any will to carry on. I need help. I used to pray thanking God at least twice a day. Blah.
My friends. Sure, I think I have good friendships but do I? Look at me and Graham - we're constantly arguing. Me and Rachel; what friendship? Me and Luke is a good example, I threw that "good friendship" away. All Rachel's fault.
My PC; always has problems. Hmm...
And whatever else. So pissed at stuff. Oh, and parents are constantly pissed at me. -_-
posted by Aaron at 8:36 pm
5 Comments:
Mark's right, hunni.
*huge hugs*
I've tried that too. That failed. I just can't talk to him - he's not listening. It's like he doesn't care.
No, I can't focus on the positive things. Well, I can now. But when I typed that it was hard. You know what calmed me down? When Charlie phoned me. It's lame, but she had the voice of an angel...
I don't have photos of good memories. I have some videos, but on the laptop and that was just too much hassle to get out. Just think about it, Kim. When you learn both of your parents will be unemployed within a year, what do you think? "Oh yeah, I know, I've got my friends to look forward to!" No, as I said, most aren't build on a good foundation.
I'll try to look on the good side of life. Let's see how that goes. Life isn't too bad right now, saying that. Bleh! Star Wars rules...*drools*
I shall think about Star Wars. And now, I can watch it over and over again because I downloaded it last night! Yay!
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